Behind These Eyes of Mine
by OmGiStHaTaDuMpLiNg
Summary: There was a time when she could sing to her heart's content. There was a time when she could tell people her name. All that ended when her father suddenly walked out on her. That is when everything fell apart. So she did what any person without any hope would do...she ran away with the circus. But even there she could not escape her fate. Maybe she really is destined to die.
1. Prologue

**HEY GUYS! SO MAYBE SOME OF YOU MAY KNOW ME FROM MY DGM FANFIC THE GIRL WHO KNEW NOTHING! IF SO, I WOULD BE SO HAPPY AND I WOULD LIKE TO ASSURE YOU THAT I HAVEN'T GIVEN UP ON UPDATING IT...I JUST NEED TO REFRESH MYSELF. YOU KNOW HOW IT CAN GET TIRING AND UNINSPIRING TO WRITE ABOUT ONE THING FOR TOO LONG. I'LL PROB GET STARTED ON IT AGIAN LATER IN THE SUMMER.**

**ANYWAYS...**

**I HOPE THAT YOU ENJOY THIS!**

**I'LL TRY TO UPDATE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE XD**

**~OmGiStHaTaDuMpLiNg~**

* * *

**_Beast never liked Paris._**

It wasn't just because she could barely understand a word of french. It was because it reminded her of the past. Despite the fact its bustling streets and decent buildings were fantastic, especially at night, it was the alleyways that called out to her. From the corner of her eye, she could see figures huddled in the darkness.

With hollowed cheeks and clothes that were falling apart at the seams, the children clung together as if the only comfort they had in their pitiful lives was each others touch. It sickened her to see that people passed them without as much as a second glance.

The next show was going to start in a few hours and she had to get back soon to prepare. Although she knew that she had to get the supplies they needed as soon as possible, she couldn't bare the thought of her being like those careless people who never had the balls to help her all those years ago.

Running a hand through her thick curls, she took a deep breath and approached them. They looked up at her with glassy eyes. Disbelief was laced throughout their washed out features as she rummaged through her bag and took out a few apples. With a bitter smile, she tossed them to the children. Scrambling, they snatched up the apples as if their lives depended on it. The way that they shared them with each other strongly reminded her of her life before the circus.

"Merci, manquez", one of them whispered.

For a second she thought it was a girl, but his voice immediately disproved her suspicions. It was deep, scratchy, and bitter. He looked up at her through his long, greasy locks. His eyes were as black as coal, hardened from his life on the street. Although he seemed to be glaring at her, as if he did not want her pity, she could see that he was grateful. His expression looked a lot like Joker's when they were younger.

Beast waved her hand and turned to leave.

"No problem, kid."

His eyes widened slightly at her english.

The others peered curiously after her but the boy held out his gangly arm to stop them from approaching her. Beast rolled her eyes. It wasn't like the english were **_that_ **bad….

Ok, maybe most of them were.

But it wasn't like the french were any better, just look how those kids were being treated.

Scoffing, Beast continued down the street. Her heeled boots clicked as she walked, she ignored the lust filled stares she was getting from the men she passed. After her encounter with those kids, she just wanted to focus on the task at hand, which was to get the bloody supplies.

After stopping by multiple stalls and bargaining for the cheapest prices in broken french, It wasn't until the sun had started to go down that Beast had finished. She sighed in exhaustion. This was another reason she hated being in a different country. It took too much damn effort to the simplest things.

Suddenly, something ran into her, jolting her from her thoughts. She cursed loudly as she stumbled. Her bags split on the street, sending their contents sprawling. When she looked up, her eyes met with pale green ones.

They were the most particular shade she had ever seen.

Lighter than the skin of a granny smith apple, they looked as if they were made of watered down grass. It took a few seconds for Beast to tear her focus from them and really take in the arse who ran into her.

Said "arse" was a young girl who couldn't have been more than 16 years old. She had choppy red, brown hair and slightly tanned skin. Although she had managed to knock Beast off her balance, the girl was so thin that it looked like she would break with a single touch. But that didn't mean that Beast forgave her. She had a long day and didn't have the patience to deal with anymore shit.

"What the hell is your problem?!", she hissed as she grabbed the girl's arm, "Are you blind or something?"

The moment she said that, she regretted it for she realized that the girl didn't meet her eye. Not because she was ashamed, but because she really couldn't see where her face was exactly. This girl really was blind.

"Awww...Fucccckkk…", Beast cursed under her breath.

The strange girl just cocked her head in confusion. It was clear that she had very little experience with foreigners. Suddenly, her ears twitched and her whole body froze with fear.

"What's Wro…"

Beast looked past the girl's shoulder, and saw what was wrong.

A group of men were approaching them, their eyes were dark with hunger. Beast immediately let the girl go and her hand twitched to her whip.

To her surprise, the young girl stood in front of her, her thin arms outstretched as if she were trying to protect her. That was a pretty gutsy of her, seeing that these men were more than two times her size.

A gutteral sound came from the back of the girl's throat. There was something preventing her from taking clearly. Beast wondered if she had any more handicaps. It could have been a grunt, but it vaguely sounded like "No" to her.

The men only laughed and continued to push towards them, saying something that was obviously supposed to be insulting. One of them grabbed her by the arm, she whimpered in protest. Beast felt her heart constrict at its sound. She didn't like to think of herself as a feely sort of person, but she couldn't just stand here and let these men bully this girl.

But before she had the chance to bring her whip down on them, she saw something silvery slip into the girl's hand. In one swift movement, the girl brought the small blade down on the man's thigh. He yelled out in pain and released her. Although she looked sick to her stomach, the girl regained her stance in front of Beast.

The man snarled at them and gestured for his friends to surround them. This time, Beast wasn't going to let this girl protect her. The fool would only just be more likely to get hurt in the end. She was about to take them out, when they suddenly crumpled to the ground. Their eyes rolled back into their heads as they were knocked out cold.

Beast could make out her family through the darkness and relaxed.

"Are you alright, Beast?", Joker asked light-heartedly.

Her cheeks turned a faint pink, and rolled her eyes. Dagger ran up to her and started to ramble, his eyes raking over her figure in his haste to make sure that she was alright. She smacked him upside the head in annoyance. While Dagger whined about her hitting him, Joker looked over her shoulder, his eyebrow cocked in interest as he took in the strange girl.

"Who's this, Beast?", he asked.

She shrugged her shoulders.

"She's a cutie...", Dagger said as he followed Joker's gaze, but quickly added, "But not as beautiful than you, dear!".

Beast rolled her eyes and raised her hand to smack him again, but was stopped by the girl, who slipped her hand into hers. As it was expected, the girl's hand wasn't soft, but calloused from years of living on the street. They were just like hers.

Joker smirked at this.

"Well, it looks like she likes you."

Beast blushed and tried to pry her hand from the girl, but she was surprisingly strong. When she looked at the girl's face, she was surprised to see tears flowing down her face. The girl's expression even though her eyes were unseeing, screamed out to her for her to take her away from all of this.

Dagger pouted and stepped forward to pull the girl off of Beast, probably out of jealousy. But Joker stopped him, his face searching the young girls.

"What is your name, dear?"

Instead of answering, the girl opened her mouth, revealing a grotesque nub at the back of her throat. Their eyes widened in horror as they realized that this girl's tongue had been cut off. Beast now understood why the girl couldn't talk.

"Who did that to you.", Dagger asked, suddenly acting like his age, "Was it those men?"

Her lips trembled as she nodded weakly.

Beast felt disgusted. She could see why, the girl was so desperate. Although she didn't understand why the girl was so willing to trust them so much already, Beast could tell that she needed to get away from this place.

"She's coming with us.", she said quickly as she sneered at the unconscious men.

Joker and Dagger exchanged solemn looks.

**_"Of course"_**

* * *

When they got back to the circus, everyone stared at the "new girl".

As much as Beast tried to get her to let go of her hand, the girl wouldn't budge. In the end, she decided it would be a waste of energy to keep trying, so Beast grudgingly let her hold her hand. Dagger was staring...well...daggers at the girl, agitated that she got to touch his beloved. Joker just remained silent as they made their way towards the main tents.

"Yo, Joker.", Peter shouted as he jumped from a crate, his sister following closely behind him, "Who's the new chick?"

Joker smiled down at him and merely shrugged.

"Have no clue.", he said light-heartedly, "She can't tell us her name."

Wendy cocked her head, frowning slightly.

"Why?"

"Let's just say, a Cat's got her tongue.", Dagger cut in as he stuck out his tongue and made a cutting motion with his finger, "...you get what I mean?"

Beast smacked him for his insensitivity.

"Oh...well that's too bad.", Wendy said awkwardly as Peter scooted closer towards the girl, putting his face very close to hers. She didn't flinch and stared back at him. Beast could tell that she was trying to make it seem that she could see him, but her focus was slightly off, resting just above his eyes.

"Blind too, I see.", he said nonchalantly.

He turned to Beast.

"I don't see how she can be helpful around here.", he continued, "She has too many disabilities."

Beast frowned. That was rich coming from him. She was about to kick him with her prosthetic leg when the girl stepped forward and smacked him. They all stared wide-eyed at her, not believing what she had done. Peter brought his hand to his cheek, which was slowly turning red from her blow.

Dagger laughed.

"Girl's got balls!", he exclaimed as he wiped amused tears from the corner of his eyes, smudging his makeup in the process.

Peter scowled and raised his hand to hit her back, just before he made contact with her skin, she grabbed his wrist. She glared at him, her chapped lips pressed in a frown. Her expression read "Bitch, please.".

Electricity seemed to flow between the two.

As entertaining as it was, they had a show to put on, so Joker pulled Peter away from her. Peter let out a "che" and stalked back to his sister, who was looking at the new girl with disdain and interest. Dagger placed a hand on the girl's shoulder, his lips still turned up in a mischievous grin.

"Oh yes.", he said still laughing, "You'll fit right in."

**_She sent him a small smile._**

* * *

**I HOPE THAT YOU GUYS LIKE THE PROLOGUE. DON'T WORRY, MY NEW OC'S NAME WILL BE REVEALED LATER ON! BTW THIS IS GOING TO FOLLOW THE MANGA, NOT THE ANIME. ALTHOUGH THE ANIME IS GOOD, I PREFER THE MANGA.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**WRITE TO YOU GUYS SOON!**

**~OmGiStHaTaDuMpLiNg~**


	2. Chapter 1: The Life of a Lilac

**HEY GUYS, SO INSTEAD OF WORKIN ON FINALS...**

**I GIVE YOU THIS! THIS CHAPTER WILL GIVE YOU MORE BG ON MY OC. WARNING, THE THEMES ARE A LITTLE DARK...IM WONDERING IF I SHOULD MAKE THIS M RATED JUST IN CASE...HMMM SUGGESTIONS IN THE REVIEWS WILL BE NICE. I DON'T WANT TO MAKE ANYONE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH MY WRITING. **

**HOPE YOU ENJOY **

**~OmGiStHaTaDuMpLiNg~**

* * *

Her day began like any other...

In darkness.

But Lilas didn't mind it, she was used to it.

She had been blind for as long as she could remember. But that didn't mean that she was completely oblivious of her surroundings like people tended to think. It was hard to describe, but her sight was replaced by her ability to feel.

Or should it be called her "sense"...

Let's just say, she was able to roughly tell where everything was by the energy they radiated. Everything had different kinds of energy, especially if they were people. Her father, for example, issued a soothing, warm presence. And the children that came into their sweet shop bristled with chaotic, yet innocent freedom.

Lilas didn't know if this was normal for blind people, but she was grateful for it. Her ability allowed her to live her life fairly normally. Some people didn't even know she was blind, ditzy maybe, due to the fact that her eyes were always unfocused.

She didn't really have any friends her age since she constantly helped out in the shop. Plus going to school was pretty redundant because she wouldn't be able to read any sort of text. So there was rumors about how she was stupid among the richer daughters of their customers.

Lilas rolled her eyes at this thought. She liked learning new things and it wasn't like she was completely uneducated. Her father couldn't afford a private tutor, so he often read to her. But she would rather be street smart than book smart anyways.

The people who didn't ridicule her knew her as the candy girl who always seemed to be in another world, which was wrong on their part. Her blindness did not mean that she wasn't human. It annoyed her to no end when people treated her like she was made of glass. Although she knew that some of them didn't have any ill intent, she hated the way they talked to her like she was wrong in the head...

Like she was a toddler...

She was almost 14 years old, for gods sake!

It was fairly calm in the store since all the children were in school, honestly, she was getting a bit lonely. But when she felt like it was getting to quiet, he always came in to keep her company. The young man was very friendly and had a confident air to him. There wasn't a doubt in her mind that he had to be very good-looking. Lilas sighed as she handed him his order.

"Merci, beacoup", she said in her melodious voice.

He quickly thanked her and handed her the money over the table, which she counted easily through her sense of touch. Opening the cash register, Lilas carefully placed the bills among the coins.

"It's amazing how you can do that, you know.", he said in awe.

She gave him a small smile as she handed him his change.

"Not really.", she replied back in english with a slight accent, "You probably could do it if you put your mind to it.".

He laughed sheepishly, running a hand through his hair.

"That's very kind of you, miss...", he replied good-naturedly, "But I don't think it's possible. I am an absolute mess without my glasses."

Shrugging, she brought out a box of candy to fill the almost empty shelves. His comment could be taken as insensitive, but she didn't mind it. She knew that he meant no harm. Actually there were times where she poked fun at her blindness when he came into the shop. It was just how their relationship was.

"You'll never know unless you try.", she said as she handed him one, "Here, this one is on the house. It's the newest Funtom product! They are very good.".

The young man gently took it from her, she felt his hand brush hers. Her eyes widened in shock as a jolt of energy surged through her body. His touch was unlike any other she had felt before. It wasn't like it was bad. She could sense genuine kindness in him. But it was like he was encased with ice, as if he didn't really want to get close to people, but did anyways.

"Thanks, darling.", he said excitedly as he unwrapped it, "How can I every repay you?!".

She mentally sighed in relief that he didn't seem to notice her momentary shocked stupor.

"You could tell me you name, for once.", she replied with an airy laugh. "You've come here for a few months now."

He seemed to think about it for a second, as she was met with silence, it was starting to get awkward when he finally spoke.

**_"It's Ronald.", he said carefully, "Ronald Knox"._**

* * *

"Lilas, I want you to watch over the shop while I'm gone."

Lilas looked up at her father and raised an eyebrow. Her father wasn't the one for traveling, it tended to make him sick and he didn't like leaving her alone. But he radiated seriousness, so she did not question it. There was only a few times her father had been serious, and that was when it had something to do with the shop.

"How long will you be gone?", she asked as she wiped the candy counter.

She felt him ruffle the top of her head affectionately.

"Not too long", he replied, "I'll be back before you know it."

There was a strange edge to his tone, but she figured it was just because he was stressed. Lately their profits hadn't been the best, they had lost many of their customers to the newer one a few blocks down.

"Is it about the shop?"

Her father sighed and ran a his hand through his hair.

"No, this is a personal matter."

An awkward silence filled the room.

Lilas shifted anxiously and clumsily hugged him.

"Ok, papa.", she whispered, "Be safe."

"Don't worry.", he replied as he kissed the top of her head, "you'll see me again before you know it."

She felt his lips twitched into a smile.

"Don't run off with any young men while I'm away."

**_"FA-FA-FATHER?!"_**

* * *

Days turned into weeks.

Weeks turned into months.

Lilas was extremely worried. She didn't know what personal matters her father had to attend to, but it shouldn't have taken this long to settle them. At least, he would have found a way to keep in contact with her.

What made matters worse, was that business was going way, way down. It was all because the shop that had caused them a little trouble in the past managed to get a royal warrant. Lilas didn't know how much longer she could keep the shop afloat.

She could hear more pity than usual in the voices of her regular customers when she talked to them. They all thought that her father had abandoned her. Honestly, as much as she hated to admit it, she couldn't help but feel the same way. But she held on. She had to. This shop was her home, her father's prized possession, her everything.

It would have been easier if she had someone she could talk to. Ronald had stopped coming to the shop soon after her father left, leaving her even more lonely. She had tried to make new friends, but the girls her age were not very genuine. And that irked her too much to make any friendship with them worth her time.

She felt like she was drowning.

**_But she was determined to survive._**

* * *

Lilas awoke at the sound of insistent pounding on the shop door. She was forced to move to the attic of the shop because she was unable to keep the small house she and her father had lived in.

Scrambling to pull something presentable over her night-gown, she hurried to the stairs. In her haste, she ended up stubbing her toe on one of the steps. Cursing under her breath she slowed down to prevent herself from getting injured even more. She wouldn't be able to afford a doctor if she fell.

"Une seconde!", she shouted as she made her way to the door.

Blowing her hair out of her face, she opened it, quite out of breath. She could feel that she was in the presence of someone large and intimidating, it was probably a man. Lilas retreated slightly, wary of his intentions. Although she believed that she shouldn't jump to conclusions, she couldn't shake the feeling that this man wasn't here for candy.

"Bonjour mademoiselle, votre père est à la maison?" **_hello miss, is your father home?_**

she shook her head as dread settled in her stomach.

"Je suis désolé de le dire, mais vous êtes en retard sur vos impôts. Nous devrons fermer votre magasin." **_I am sorry to say, but you are behind on your taxes. We will have to close your shop._**

* * *

Lilas couldn't really remember what happened next.

Time passed in a flurry of suffering, loss, and broken dreams. Instead of waking up in her nice, small bed, she found herself curled up on the softest part of the street she could find. Instead of sorting out candies in her shop, she was shifting through garbage for breakfast.

It was only when she was plunged into this living hell, she realized how much of her life she took for granted. She hated to think back to when she was so naïve, and as the weeks came and went, she gradually became more and more cynical.

Paris and its reputation of being the city of love was utterly hypocritical. People didn't care that she was starving and suffering. Not even the other street urchins, who cared about only themselves...

Although she couldn't say that they weren't really justified.

People give her pitying looks, but never stopped to actually help her. They passed by as quickly as they came, even though some of them were her customers in the past.

She was truly on her own.

Lilas couldn't bring herself to cry though, her tears had dried up long ago. There were many times when she debated if it would be better if she left the city, but she could never bring herself to carry out her plans.

Despite all that had happened, she felt rooted to this city, it didn't help that she didn't know what she would do if she did leave. She would probably continue to be struggling no matter what she did, so it didn't make sense to waste her energy. In order for her to be able to leave, she needed a higher purpose. Something she could hope for...

to strive for...

something that would make her life worth living again.

Loneliness was bad, but feeling empty was even worse. Her pale green eyes stared blankly into the darkness of the alleyway, not that she could see anything in the dark anyways. Lilas was so deep in her thoughts that she didn't notice the group of drunken men stumbling towards her.

She couldn't hear their slurred laugher.

She ignored their taunts.

It wasn't until she felt one of them pull her to him, she broke out of her trance.

Thrashing and screaming, she struggled to get free. She heard the man curse as he dropped her painfully on the ground. She tried to scramble to her feet while his friends laughed at him, but he pulled her back, ripping her dress in the process.

What happened next was too painful and horrid for her to comprehend. It wasn't until hours later, when they left her battered, bloodied, and naked, she realized what happened to her. She sobbed uncontrollably as she tried to push herself off the ground.

Her tongue felt like it was on fire, and she choked on her blood as she rummaged around, looking for her clothes. Once she managed to pull on the scraps she had left, she brought her hand to her mouth. The smell of iron was overwhelming. When she felt the damage that they had done she let out a gutteral scream...

But just like before...

**_No one heard her._**

* * *

Lilas spent the next year and a half hiding...

She hid from the men who defiled her in a niche in the sewer system. It was warmer and cleaner than you would expect it to be, and she could still hear the streets through one of the grates not too far away.

Seeing that she was already blind, the constant darkness didn't bother her. She could hear the day come and go, with only the rats to keep her company. But one day, raucous music reached her ears, followed by excited laughter. Curious, she pulled herself up from her makeshift bed of garbage and made her way towards the grate.

**_"Come see the Noah's Ark Circus!"_**

**_"Be ready to be awed and amazed!"_**

**_"Only here for the next week!"_**

She heard in horribly accented french.

The young man sounded english.

A circus...

It had been years since one had come to the city. The last one she went to was nearly five years ago with her father. A biter taste filled her mouth at that thought. She still didn't come to terms with the fact that her father had disappeared. She didn't know whether he had abandoned her on his own, or something actually happened to him. Either scenario was unpleasant, and she didn't really want to think about it.

The sounds of children laughing shook her from her memories. They sounded so inviting, she was tempted to crawl out of her safe haven to join them. She could feel the warmth of the sun on her face as she carefully brought her face up to the grate.

Her fingers wrapped around their bars as she continued to listen to the circus pass by. They sounded so free, so happy, so fulfilled. What a life it would be, making people from all walks of life happy, experiencing new things...

Suddenly, a glorious realization dawned upon her.

What if she joined the circus!

She had always loved making her customers happy back in her sweet shop.

Although she knew that it was childish and unrealistic, she didn't care at the moment. She didn't care that she didn't have a particular talent to give. She didn't care that they would probably never accept her because of her disabilities. All she cared about was that for the first time in a long time, she had hope.

A goofy smile spread across her face.

**_She was going to the circus._**

* * *

It was just her luck to be caught in this situation.

She just **_had_** to leave her hiding place.

Lilas mentally cursed herself as she ran, occasionally bumping into things in her haste. Not to far behind her, was the same group of men who tormented her earlier. She didn't even know how they recognised her. She was even more mangled and scrawny than before. It was like they were freaking blood hounds or something! Why did they find the need to torment her, they already took so much from her!

Anger started to build up inside of her.

**_It wasn't fair._**

**_She had done nothing to them._**

**_They were the ones who deserved to die._**

Suddenly she found herself on the ground. She was so immersed in her thoughts, that she had carelessly run over someone. While they cursed, Lilas could hear their items roll around into the street. It was a woman, a powerful one. Lilas could sense that the stranger was confident. She could also sense a sort of rough kindness in her and could feel her glare.

"What the hell is your problem?!", they hissed as they grabbed her by the arm, "What are you blind or something.".

A few moments later they cursed again. But this time it sounded regretful. It was obvious that they realized her birth defect. Before Lilas could help her up, she heard the incoming footsteps of the men who were chasing her before. She tensed, a new wave of hate laced with fear flooded through her. Her companion shifted restlessly, realizing their hostile company.

Standing up, Lilas shielded her company. She wasn't going to let these bastards do what they did to her to this woman. With great effort, she tried to speak, but it came out as a sort of gurgle.

The men only laughed and continued to push towards them

"Regardez, c'est notre vieille pute! Et elle a un ami!" **_Look, it's our old whore! And she has a friend!_**

One of them grabbed Lilas by the arm, she whimpered in protest. Slipping the glass shard she kept hidden in her sleeve for protection into her hand, she quickly brought it down on the man's leg. He cried out in pain, swearing profusely as he let her go.

The familiar smell of blood sickened her, and reminded her of that day. His almost inhumane snarls brought her back to her senses, adrenaline thundered through her system. But he suddenly collapsed in front of her, followed by the rest of his friends. Lilas felt two new presences, she could tell that they were friendly because they called out to her companion.

"Are you alright, Beast?"

That was a strange name for a woman, but she liked it.

It suited her.

"Who's this, Beast?", The young man asked she felt him turn towards her.

"She's a cutie...", his companion said good-naturedly, but quickly added, "But not as beautiful than you, dear!".

Lilas slipped her hand into Beast's, she had recognised the second boy's voice. It was the one promoting the circus! She wasn't going to let all of her troubles go to waste. Beast's hands were calloused much like hers, which signified her as a hard worker...

A survivor...

Just like her.

Lilas held on a little tighter, she couldn't help it.

For the first time in a long time, she felt safe.

She didn't feel alone anymore.

"Well, it looks like she likes you."

Lilas could feel the young man shift anxiously, jealousy ran off him in waves. Hmmm...maybe her liked Beast. It wasn't like he was hostile about it or anything. Actually, it was quite cute. He reminded her of a puppy.

"What is your name, dear?", she heard the older man ask.

There was warmth in his voice.

She almost cried, it was so nice...

Instead of answering, she opened her mouth, revealing the grotesque nub at the back of her throat. She could feel their shock, anger, disgust as they realized that her tongue had been cut off.

"Who did that to you.", the young man asked more seriously, the jealousy melting away from his voice, "Was it those men?"

Her lips trembled as she nodded weakly.

"She's coming with us.", Beast said quickly.

Lilas almost cried in relief and held on to Beast's hand like it was her life line.

**_"Of course"_**

* * *

When they got back to the circus, Lilas could tell that everyone was staring at the her. She wasn't used to so much attention so she unconsciously shifted closer to Beast and held on tighter. Although she knew that she was starting to be a nuisance, she couldn't help it.

But Beast seemed to understand, and didn't reprimand her. The young man, who she learned whose name was Dagger, glared at her. His jealousy was back and in full throttle. It was kinda amusing, and her lips twitched into a small smile.

"Yo, Joker.", a child shouted out. The soft thump that followed him revealed that he head jumped from something, "Who's the new chick?"

"Have no clue.", Joker said airily, "She can't tell us her name."

"Why?", asked a young girl.

Lilas could feel the bond between the children, there was no doubt in her mind that they were brother and sister. But there was a strange aura to them, it was much to developed and mature for their ages...

"Let's just say, a Cat's got her tongue.", Dagger cut in, "...you get what I mean?"

Lilas had heard worse, so it didn't bother her. But that didn't mean that she wasn't grateful when Beast smacked him on the head for his insensitive comment.

"Oh...well that's too bad.", the girl said awkwardly as Lilas felt the boy scoot closer towards her, putting his face very close to hers.

She didn't flinch, and even though she felt slightly sick from their close contact, she met his gaze as solidly as she could.

"Blind too, I see.", he said nonchalantly.

God damn it...

He turned to Beast.

"I don't see how she will helpful around here.", he continued, "She has too many disabilities."

Anger bubbled in her stomach, and without thinking she stepped forward and smacked him hard across the face. An awed silence filled the tent. But it wasn't long until Dagger started to laugh.

"Girl's got balls!", he exclaimed.

It sounded like he was crying from the hilarity of it all.

Was what she did that funny?

She could feel the younger boy raise his hand, about to hit her. Her survival instincts kicked in and she caught him by his wrist. She was not going to let another man, even though her was a boy, touch her in any way she deemed unnecessary. He would not hit her. She wouldn't stand for it.

Electricity seemed to flow between the them

After a few moments, Joker pulled him away from her and he stalked off with his sister, cursing under his breath.

Lilas almost started in surprise as Dagger placed a hand on her shoulder, she could tell that he was grinning.

"Oh yes.", he said still laughing, "You'll fit right in."

**_She sent him a small smile._**

* * *

**SO THERE YOU HAVE IT!**

**NOW YOU KNOW WHAT HER NAME IS AND HER PAST. I HOPE THAT THIS ISN'T TOO RUSHED. I JUST WANT THIS TO BE FOCUSED MORE ON HER DEVELOPMENT WITH THE CIRCUS THAN HER PAST.**

**SORRY FOR THE HORRIBLE FRENCH. I DO NOT KNOW ANY OF THE LANGUAGE AND PROBABLY BUTCHERED IT WITH GOOGLE TRANSLATE...XD**

**I HOPE THAT YOU'VE ENJOYED AND THAT I DIDN'T MAKE YOU GUYS TOO DEPRESSED. **

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**AND CHECK OUT MY OTHER FANFICS IF YOUR A DGM FAN! *HINT HINT NUDGE NUDGE***

**WRITE TO YOU GUYS SOON!**

**~OmGiStHaTaDuMpLiNg~**


	3. Chapter 2: A New Family

**HEY GUYS! **

**SORRY FOR A LATE UPDATE, MY FAMILY FORCED ME TO GO UP TO NH WITH THEM AND WE USUALLY DON'T HAVE INTERNET...**

**LUCKILY, OUR NEIGHBORS ARE UP FOR A FEW DAYS, SO I AM CURRENTLY STEALING THEIRS LOL I'M SUCH A REBEL. I HOPE THAT YOU ENJOY THIS CHAPTER...**

**HOPEFULLY, IT ISN'T TOO RUSHED. **

**OH YEAH, I AM OPEN TO OC'S SO JUST PM ME OR LEAVE A REVIEW IF YOU'RE INTERESTED. I HAVE DECIDED THAT THIS STORY IS GOING TO BE MY FOCUS FOR THIS SUMMER, SO IM GOING TO REALLY GET THIS ONE GOING :D IT ALSO HELPS THAT THE NEWEST SEASON OF KUROSHITSUJI IS COMING OUT SOON! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS IN THE MANGA GET ANIMATED! SODGHSDGHDUGSLJDFOILJDSMLKDANGFAODISGHASOFASDJFK (IM FREAKING OUT LOL) **

**ANYWAYS...**

**ON TO THE STORY! **

**~OmGiStHaTaDuMpLiNg~**

* * *

Lilas couldn't remember the last time she had this much fun.

Even though she was unable to physically see the acts, the atmosphere made up for her handicap ten fold.

The smell of caramel corn made her mouth water and her heart accelerated with the audience's every "Oooh's" and "Ahhhh's". It was as if they were cut off from the rest of the world, isolated in a wonderful bubble of wonder, magic, and fun. Nestled in the front row, she was able to get a thorough perspective of her saviors' talents. So far, Dagger's act was her favorite.

The sound of the knife cutting through the air was almost rhythmic. The beautiful arc of his throw seemed to be able to control death itself. Every time his knives hit their mark, exciting chills run down her back to the tips of her toes. By the end of his performance, she found that she had leaned so far forward in anticipation that she almost lost her balance.

But all in all, the circus was extraordinary and Lilas couldn't help but feel doubtful that she could ever match them. She didn't even know if she could be considered talented, not after her gift was ripped forcefully from her throat. Sitting silently as the crowd started to file out of the main tents, Lilas became so engrossed in her thoughts and the throbbing of her heart that it wasn't until Joker placed a hand on her shoulder, she realized how late it had gotten.

"Did you enjoy the show?", he asked tentatively, smelling of sweat, and makeup with a hint of cotton candy.

Tears welled up in her eyes, out of happiness and doubt as she nodded. She sent him a chaste smile as she took him by the hand, slightly surprised at its skeletal texture. Lilas didn't realize that he was missing a hand….

But even though he lacked the flesh, Lilas found that his touch brought her more comfort than she thought was possible. She felt him push her long bangs out of her face with his other hand. It wasn't a romantic gesture at all, but rather like she was a small child that he was trying to comfort.

"Good!" he replied kindly, "Now that the show is over, I would like to have you visit the medical tent as a check up."

Letting him pull her out of her seat, she followed him out of the tent. The cool, night air was refreshing against her skin after being in that stuffy tent for the duration of the show. Her ear's twitched as she heard the familiar sounds of Dagger's footsteps coming towards them.

"Damn, that was a good show!" he exclaimed excitedly, "You were lucky to see such a show.".

Dagger silently cursed under his breath soon after, realizing that what he said was insensitive. She heard him run a hand through his hair in frustration and his heart beat quicken ever so slightly. Her silence seemed to make him feel even more awkward, especially when she turned to face him completely.

"Err...I mean..."

Lilas cracked a small smile.

It was quite adorable when he got flustered. He was just like an over grown child. Although she could tell that he could be annoying at times, there was always lightness to him. It was refreshing. There weren't many people like that today. Lilas was sure that he could come out of a war smiling, his spirit was almost overflowing with vitality and light. Sure enough, he bounced back and quickly regained his enthusiasm.

Throwing an arm over her shoulder, Lilas almost lost her balance from his sudden touch. She flinched slightly, but he didn't seem to notice. In the back of her mind, she couldn't help but being slightly disgusted. She wasn't used to being touched by men. At least, she wasn't used to being touched by a man whose intentions were completely honorable.

You could say that even though she knew that they were not like the monsters that defiled her, she was still a little on edge.

"Which was your favorite?" Dagger cut in, sounding like he already considered her a dear friend, "Just nod when I say the person's name."

"Beast."

Lilas smiled but didn't nod as she pulled away from him as politely as she could. He didn't seem to mind and continued his count off. She heard Joker sigh beside her because of Dagger's childishness. There was no doubt in her mind that the older teen was rolling his eyes.

"Peter and Wendy"

Her smile faltered at Peter's name. She didn't really like that boy, but she had nothing against his sister. The way their bodies cut through the air was impressive, but it didn't really catch her attention like the others had. Although, that might have been because she had a bad impression of them (cough cough..Peter) earlier on.

"Joker"

Lilas raised an eyebrow. Joker was the ringleader, he didn't really have an act. But she couldn't deny that he had a lovely stage presence. It was admirable how he was able to engross the audience, particularly the children, from the beginning of the show. He was extremely charismatic, and there was something very attractive in his aura.

"Aww. That hurts missy." Joker cut in sarcastically.

Lilas smiled sheepishly at this but his chuckles showed that he didn't mind.

"Jumbo"

Her eyes lit up, she enjoyed the warmth that came from his flames. But his act was pure, unrefined power. Although flames were comforting and beautiful, they could never truly be controlled. That aspect made her nervous. She was always on edge during his performance, but not necessarily in the good way all the time.

"Doll"

Lilas pursed her lips, her brows furrowing in thought. She had thoroughly enjoyed Doll's act. It was much more graceful and elegant than the others and she admired that. Lilas could hear the slight strain of the tightrope with Doll's every movement, it sounded as if the girl was playing a precious sting instrument. But Lilas still preferred Dagger's performance.

Dagger seemed to realize that he was the only one left. She could tell that a large smirk was spreading across his face. Rolling her eyes at his childishness, she lightly punched him on the arm before nodding.

**_Dagger and Joker bickered about her choice all the way to the medical tent._**

* * *

To say that Dagger was smug would be an understatement.

The blind girl had just admitted that his act was the best.

He regarded this as an achievement on his part since there must have been an element his act had that the others were missing. But he had to admit, seeing her watching them was sort of unnerving. She would have been a plain girl, with her mousey hair and scrawny figure, if it weren't for her eyes. He had never seen anything like them. Even though they were glassy and unfocused, those extremely light green orbs of her's possessed a higher awareness.

Her attentiveness gave her the air that she was searching for something within everything around her. In his mind, she should have been born in a land where pixie and ghosts roamed the earth. There were times when she opened her mouth, like she wanted to speak, but she promptly pressed her lips together when this happened. It was obvious that she was very insecure about her muteness.

He couldn't imagine what it must have been like for her.

Honestly, he would have probably gone mad since he was quite a chatterbox himself. It might be insensitive of him, but he thought that her inability to talk made her even more mysterious and approachable.

He wanted to know her story...

What she was really thinking.

Amazingly, she seemed to notice that he was staring at her. She tilted her head much like a puppy as she pressed her chapped lips into an awkward smile. Dagger quickly averted his gaze and ignored Joker, who was trying to stifle his laughter.

He felt his neck grow hot in embarrassment and mouthed some pretty explicit insults at his brother. The girl quickly smacked him upside the head, as if she knew full well what he had said. He gaped at her as she quickened her pace, the ragged dress nearly falling off her shoulders as she opened the flap of the tent. Even though she had her back towards him, he could tell that she was smirking.

Dagger was going to make sure that Doc gave her a thorough health check, because it was like she wasn't even blind.

When they stepped inside, he was surprised to find that all of his family was there.

Immediately, he ran to his dearest sister. She was so beautiful, even when she was scolding him, which she was doing the moment he flung himself at her. Doll and the others were more focused on the mystery girl, who shifted where she stood in discomfort. Doc wheeled himself forward, his dark eyes already taking in the damage done to her body. Immediately he began to ask questions.

"Who is she?"

"We don't know. We found her on the streets." Beast said bitterly, "As you can see, this was the best for her."

Doll looked at the girl as if she wanted to pull her into a hug, but the look that Peter gave her stopped her. Wendy still seemed impartial to the new girl, as if she was waiting to decide whether she was worth their time.

"Have you been blind your whole life?" The girl slowly nodded as she played with her stained skirt.

Now that she was in the light, they could clearly see just how battered she was. To his horror, he noticed there were some rusty-brown stains on it.

It was dried-up blood.

"Have you been mute your whole life too?" She stiffened at this and grew paler, her eyes sharpening until they were almost cat-like.

Wrapping her arms around herself, she looked as if she was trying wipe off a disgusting touch. For a split second he thought that he saw tears well in her eyes. A depressing, angry aura rolled off of her in waves. Being one of the people who found her, Dagger knew what had happened to her. His fists clenched at his sides as he remembered the group of men that circled her and his sister like vultures not too long ago.

He had a stinking feeling that they had done a lot more to the poor girl, indescribable, horrific things that she would never be able to fully tell them. He wondered how long she had suffered because of them.

Doc circled her, taking in her condition and making notes.

"Yes, well...she is quite malnourished..." he said in concern, "And must have suffered dearly."

"That is why we brought her back." Joker said.

"She can obviously understand English as well as French. But it is a shame that she had no way of communicating clearly with us." Doc continued, his brow furrowed in thought, "She probably has a French name...it will be almost impossible to know at this point."

"What about sign language?" Peter suggested with a mean smirk, knowing full well it would bother the girl

"Don't be an arse, Peter." Beast retorted, "You already know that is impossible."

Peter sulked and turned to Wendy, but she also sent him a slightly disapproving look.

"What about a sort of code?" Doll exclaimed, still looking like she wanted to hug the girl.

"That could work..." Doc replied, "But it will be very hard for her to learn, unless she already knows her alphabet..."

"I doubt that..." Dagger cut in, "We found her in the streets."

Too everyone's surprise, the girl smirked, her eyes shining with a slight mischievous light.

"What?!" Dagger felt himself exclaim, "You know!?" She looked at him like she was tired of being treated like a child.

"Err..sorry..", he replied hastily, "I just assumed..."

Jumbo stepped forward. It was almost comical the way that he absolutely towered over her, she looked like she would crumble away if he blew on her. She didn't seem to be afraid of his large frame, as if she could tell that he was really a softy at heart.

"How old are you?"

She tilted her head in thought. After a few moments, she approached him and tapped his hand slowly. They all counted 16 delicate taps. Dagger's felt his eyes widen in disbelief, she was not too much younger than him, and he thought she was ten!

"Well..." Doll cut in, breaking the awed silence.

**_"I call dibs for 'aving her as meh roomie!"_**

* * *

**_~A year later~ _**

At first, her life at the circus was fairly boring.

Because of her very weak condition, she was forced to live in the medical tent. Her food was brought to her and it didn't take her long to figure out that they were trying to get her to fill out a bit. Having meat and potatoes every day was pretty extravagant for a carnie who didn't even work. She spent her time listening to the Doctor, who she found pretty nice. Eccentric and slightly off his rocker, but nice enough, and it wasn't like she couldn't get used to it.

He slowly taught her a code he had developed specifically for her. But she had so much free time that before long, she was tapping full conversations on the back of his hand...

Sometimes too fast for him to translate.

It felt amazing to be able to communicate, to be able to express her inner thoughts to the tee. As strange his aura could be at times, Doc became a precious friend. When he had free time, he would even write down her thoughts for her or messages to send to the others. Although, they were busy running the circus, most of them made time to visit her. It was taking them a longer time learning the code, so Doc often acted as her voice.

But by the third month she was living at the circus, and she was discharged from the medical tent, they all surprised her by revealing that they all had worked together to be able to understand her new language.

Once she had moved into Doll's tent, they "talked" to each other for hours at a time. For the first time in her life, Lilas knew what it was like to have a friend who was a girl her age. It was so much fun and she learned everything about the circus. She was so proud of her friends for starting such a wondrous establishment. They were so humble about it, minus Peter and Dagger, who were naturally smug...

That was just how they were.

To her surprise, she had become a sort of legend in the circus.

She was given many names because many couldn't pronounce "Lilas" correctly. Only those who had french roots we able to regard her as such, but there were very few of them since Noah's Arc Circus was originally from England. Most of the circus staff regarded her as the "Performer's Lucky Flower" or their "Ace" since the circus had been a hit since she lived with them.

Unfortunately, because she was ready to work, Lilas didn't have much free time to "watch" the performances. She had to make do with only listening to the shows while she peeled potatoes in the kitchen tent. Being in charge of the food was a lot of work since she had so many people to feed. But because she was used to cooking and cleaning before she lived on the streets, she quickly settled into her new job. It was quite rewarding when she was complemented for her cooking, so although it was not glamorous life, she felt at home...

Which was something she hadn't felt for a very long time.

Brushing some flour from her shirt, Lilas made her way to the makeshift oven to pull out some bread. Most of the food she made for the company consisted of bread, stew, and mystery meat at times. Lilas quickly realized that having something sweet was rare, but she believed that everyone deserved a treat. They had been so successful lately...

"Yo, Lili!" Peter popped in, making Lilas jump, "What's for lunch?"

She sent him a small smile as she quickly cut him a thick slice of bread and poured a bit of stew on it. Although the relationship between Peter and her was rocky in the beginning, Lilas realized that he was like an alley cat...

Nasty towards strangers...

And sweet once in a blue moon...

It helps if you give him good food.

"Hmmm.." he sighed as he stuffed it into his mouth, "Edible, as always."

Lilas rolled her eyes playfully and brought her hand to his shoulder.

"Hungry...as always..." she lightly tapped, "I was thinking of heading into town to get more supplies."

Peter swallowed quickly at this, although he never said it out loud, he cared about her to an extent...

You could say that he saw her as a close acquaintance.

"The others are too busy and you shouldn't go off all by yourself." he replied rather maturely.

Lilas pouted and crossed her arms. She knew why they were always protective of her, especially when they were in big cities like the one they were in now, but she felt like she could fend for herself now she was stronger.

"We are running low, ", she tapped furiously to emphasize her point, "and I won't be able to make dinner if I don't go."

That was a lie, but she figured that it would all be worth it when they were all digging into the cake she was planning on making. Peter sighed and ran a hand through his hair; he knew full well that she was stubborn enough to go anyways.

"Fine...Go," he said reluctantly, "I'll tell the others where you're going, but I am getting one of the errand boys to go with you."

She huffed in annoyance. Although they had realized by now that even though she was blind, she had some other sense that basically made her equal to a normal person, they were always put on edge when she tried to do the smallest of things on her own. But it was starting to get late and she wanted to get to the marketplace before it got too busy, so she nodded. A little over ten minutes later, a boy no older than ten joined her. He was the newbie and apparently, he had a cursed arm that was red as fresh blood and as grotesque as a monster's.

To her surprise, many of the circus folk seemed to avoid him. He didn't seem dangerous in any sense, rather, he always issued a bitter loneliness she could relate to. However, it was like there was some unawakened vitality buried underneath his distant nature...

"What do ya need to buy?" he asked in annoyance, making sure that he was walking slightly behind her.

She sent him a small smile. He had just joined the crew, so he didn't know the extent of her disabilities. Because she didn't feel like mentally scarring the young boy by showing her nub of a tongue, she handed him a list she had Doc write out for her before she left. He took it from her in silence.

"I don't know how ta read this shit."

Lilas face palmed and rolled her eyes.

This is why she wanted to go alone.

Sighing, she gestured to her throat then shook her head.

"What is ya throat hurting ya?" he replied in frustration, "Or are ya afraid of talking ta me like the other bastards?"

Sadness and pity bubbled in her stomach, overpowering her frustration. She wanted to pull the child to her, tell him that it wasn't like that at all. But she couldn't, he gave her the sense that he would just push her away. It would be useless to attempt to get him to see that he didn't have to be alone if he couldn't realize that he all he had to do was try. So, predictably, when she moved to hold his hand, he pulled away as he cursed at her in his fluster.

The rest of the trip was uneventful and silent.

She quickly bought all the supplies, not bothering to bargain for the prices since she didn't have her Doc to translate for her. She might get in trouble for that...

But it would be worth it in the end.

By now, the boy who accompanied her was weary of her, and seemed to realize that she was limited more than he was told. Actually, Lilas wasn't sure how much Peter had told the boy. He did give him very little notice and the boy worked at the opposite end of the circus. To her surprise, he pulled at her sleeve, making her stop.

"There's a freak show..." he said quietly. He sounded scared and she could hear him fumble with the sleeve of his left arm.

Lilas frowned as she heard the sketchy voice of announcer, his voice was cruel and shrill. She felt sick just from being in proximity to such a horrible man. To her dismay, a crowd began to form behind them, pushing them forward.

"Step right up, Ladies and Gents!" he exclaimed, "Come see the snake man!"

"He won't bite." the man continued with glee, "I've properly trained him."

To emphasize his point, he slammed his cane to the bars of the cage, causing whoever was inside jump and hiss.

Lilas was startled to feel the man grasp her arm and pull her forward, she had to grab the bars to prevent herself from colliding with them. The boy by her side swore at the man, but he was ignored.

"Take a close look missy." the announcer sneered, "Ain't he a beast?"

Honestly, she didn't feel frightened at all. Even when she felt a cool breath on her cheek, signifying that she was face to face with the caged individual. But whoever was inside scurried away from her.

"Too, close..." the stranger hissed, "Too close, says Wordsworth."

It sounded like a teenaged boy, not too much older than herself. Lilas hand twitched to the knife that she always concealed in her boot. If there weren't for the crowd, she would have gutted the man right then and there. Instead of screaming in horror the announcer was obviously looking for, she smiled kindly at the teen and pulled out some berries she had gotten for the cake.

Luckily, her hands were small enough to slip through the bars, so she held out a hand full for him to take.

Hesitantly, he approached her and gently took them from her hand, he was cool to the touch and his skin was scaly. It was a strange feeling, but he wasn't at all threatening. He wasn't a monster. He didn't belong in a cage...

Lilas was promptly pulled away only to be pressed against the fat announcer's side. He laughed nervously as he tightened his grip. She gritted her teeth as she tried to pry herself from his grasp.

"No, no, no, little girl." he said in between chuckles, "It's dangerous to feed the animal!"

But her act of kindness seemed to motivate the crowd. The people began to whisper and sent the man disapproving looks, especially when they realized her discomfort. Finally the errand boy stepped forward and pulled her from his grasp.

"Let go of my sister, ya pervert!" he snarled.

Lilas raised an eyebrow at this, but was grateful. She didn't know how much longer she could last. Although, she hated to think of harming anyone, she was extremely tempted to cut off this bastard's manhood...

To avoid any more attention, they quickly pushed their way through the crowd. The boy swore under his breath as he pulled her by the arm, almost running to get back to the circus. All the while, Lilas couldn't forget the caged teen. She decided that the first thing she was going to do when she got back was to tell the others.

They had helped her, so they would definitely help him...

**_Besides, she couldn't live with herself knowing that a human being was being kept in a cage like an animal._**

* * *

**I HOPE YOU'VE ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE REVIEW AND DON'T BE AFRAID OF SENDING ME BIOS (THE MORE DETAILED, THE BETTER.)OF ANY OC YOU WANT ME TO WORK INTO THE STORY. I LOVE TO WORK WITH OTHER AUTHORS!**

**PS. DO ANY OF YOU KNOW WHO THE LITTLE BOY IS? ;) (its a sort of cross over...idk if im actually going to go further into it...he's prob going to be a minor appearance lol) (look at my other fanfic..that would prob help XD)**

**WRTIE TO YOU SOON (HOPEFULLY)**

**~OmGiStHaTaDuMpLiNg~**


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